Lately I've been lashing out at people. Not at anyone here on GS, mind you, but I have been doing it nonetheless. I didn't think I was capable of it, but instead of addressing the real problem, I'm attacking other people (though often times they deserve it.) No, the real problem is me. I'm not helping anybody; I'm not much use to people. I think I'm going to take some time off GS, though I've hardly been posting for most of the year. See you guys (and gals) around.

Oh internet drama, how I love you so. I'm going to keep this short because no one really cares - not even me - but I thought I'd give my two cents on the matter of The Foreign Grounds (Note: whenever I say TFG I am referring to the place, not the fine user the_foreign_guy).

Far be it for me to demonize every user at TFG. I have been there plenty of times, and even have an account. Though over the months, one board in particular became sort of a cesspool for GS hate. Normally the hate would center around mods or admins, or even the state of the community itself. I use 'cesspool' in a flattering way, really. It's not that there's a bunch of trolls burning a sculpture of "GS" in effigy (if that's even possible) there, and for the most part it is an alright community. Then the drama came in.

Particular users who convene at TFG had it in their right minds to troll GS. Did they plan it at TFG? No. At the surface, TFG is just coincidental. Sure, they go to TFG, but they probably talk over MSN. Does that make MSN a bad place? Of course not, and I don't want to outright demonize TFG that way either. The problem is that many users hate GS with a sort of passion that would probably be slated by just ignoring the site altogether. That wasn't the case.

Trolling a site should never be condoned. If you don't like a site, simply stop going to it. If you don't like the community, go ahead and complain on another site, but it'd be in everyone's interests to just forget the site completely. This is a plea to everyone to just please let this go. If you don't like GS, stop coming. If you dislike TFG because of the trolling on their part, ignore them too. I believe TFG has been trolled by GS users, and as I said: it should never be condoned. Simply stop going to a site if you don't like it. I don't know why one has to say that more that once. To everyone of GS and TFG, let's all just hold hands and sing songs. Unless you don't like one-another, and in that case you can go to the corner and do something else. Thank you.

Hate is a strong word. There was a time when I didn't really hate anybody, or anything. But over the past few months, hate has begun to grasp my heart. There is a man, a boy rather. Whenever his name is mentioned, it fills me with disgust and jealousy. The latter is yet another emotion I have not felt until now. No, this boy has changed everything, and I feel like this is going to be some stupid blog post where nothing is fixed, and no one cares. It will be.

Am I above mentioning this boy's name? No. His name is Tom. Yes, Tom. He is a scared, little boy who will beat you down when things don't go his way. I suppose I'm doing the same thing now. Why do I hate Tom? It's a pretty long story that no one will care about, so let's just say it involves a girl; a woman, rather. See, I began to feel strong emotions for this woman (and I still do up to this day), but she is seeing Tom. You can see where the jealousy starts to kick in. But what about disgust? Well, Tom found out and came after me. No big deal, right? They're going out, and they obviously love each other, so why should I pry any further?

Well, Tom suffers a crippling disability that must be brought up: he has an ego the size of an elephant. Does he hide the fact? No, he knows his weakness, and will mention them if asked. That's commendable. But no, that doesn't make it right. You see, he has a great knack for putting himself above anyone who opposes him. It's his nature. The fact of the matter is, this Tom hates me, too. I'm not sure if I hate him as much as he hates me, but what can I do? He won't confront me. He threw me down, but I came right back up. What did he do? Well, he's ignoring me. Then he started estalking me. He won't be the 'man' he thinks himself to be, and confront me. What do you have to lose, Tom? Nothing, really. The only person who has anything to lose is me, but I don't even care anymore.

So I guess you could consider this an open letter to him. Telling him to talk to me about why he hates me, and why I shouldn't hate him in return. I always thought I was a decent person, but it appears I'm not. I'm as dark as the heart of any human being. Is it nature as well? Who cares. Tom, I have everything to lose. Come. Beat me down, and tell me what I really am, because I'd like to hear it. If you really are above me, show me. Tell me something, Tom, tell me what I want to hear. I'm ready to lose more self-esteem, and I need your help.