I've been reflecting a lot lately. Specifically, reflecting on GameSpot's influence on my life. I came here on my birthday, back in 2004. I wanted to join earlier, but I refused to lie about my age to meet the 13-or-over-only policy. Over time I grew up thanks to this site. The lads at Church & State had more influence on my teenage development than a lot of people in real life. It's eerie to think of it, but I've been friends (more or less!) with them for longer than most of my current close friends. We may be seperated by fiber optic cable and computer screen, yet there is still a personal connection.
GameSpot has almost become an archive of my high school years. There are blog posts here that I remember making seemingly years ago. I can look through old posts and see how I used to be an anti-American socialist with a closed-mind and a penchant for trolling. How things change. I hope to continue loving this website, even though I rarely use it these days. I will never forget some of the people I encountered here. CanadianNooB, Elraptor, MarcusAntonius, Herrdoktor, Poopskadopp, syx, Smaug, MeanQuestion, elmo... the list goes on into eternity. Thank you all, and I love you all.
Now Let's GameSpot.
Here's a piece, written about my favourite thing, me. It's a short narrative story, but I find it to be Pulitzer-worthy.
On Jerky Love
A Thesis par Keenan Nurmsoo
Dare not call the beauty of its red packaging false. Cursed be the man, woman, or child that considers its sweet flavour artificial. Oberto is my shepard, delivering me from evil, in the form of authentic beef jerky. And don’t forget the refreshing, heart-attack inducing power of Rockstar energy drink. Without its guidance, my coffee break is a mere shade of the coffee break it deserves to be. Forgive me for the long-winded introduction, for the meat of the story lies within the creamy nougat centre of the narrative. ‘Twas a late evening. I was thirsting and full of hunger. The setting of our scene is Zellers Incorporated, a division of Hudson’s Bay Company. Indeed, I am in the employ of the Hudson’s Bay Company. Trading furs... exploring the wild... mapping... wearing pretty sashes... maybe naming a lake or small creek after myself. I don’t know. Retail isn’t glamourous. Forgive me for romanticizing, okay? It’s not enough that I’ve got to write in some form of English no person can understand. Ahem. Back to the glorious narrative. I spotted a package of Oberto beef jerky, and a can of Rockstar. It was perfect for break-time snacking! So, with great joy, I purchased Oberto teriyaki-flavoured beef jerky and a can of Rockstar. I then proceeded to the break room. No one in sight. Just me, some beef jerky, and a can of Rockstar. No one to be all up in my face about the grossness of what I was eating. Score, I daresay. If you want me to describe the taste of teriyaki beef jerky with a Rockstar chaser, I’d have to compare it to a charming dinner party on a midsummer’s eve, where the guests all compliment your parlour’s interior decorating, and your manservant Jorge isn’t talking about how he killed twenty-seven men in search of Mayan gold. Yes, it was that delicious. It tasted like that scenario. Don’t ask me how. It just did. And so, my break was refreshing.
Positively succulent, like a fine steak.
-otwall
