ATTENTION ALL WINDOWS USERS: a meteor has been spotted and is heading your way. Experts say it will land much sooner than 2012; in fact, it will be here in exactly four days. Nosrsly.Four days.
Backup your stuff, reinstall that virus protection, learn how to turn off the internet (GameSpot and MySpace aren't going anywhere, don't worry), and stock up your cellars for the oncoming impact. Or alternatively, you can just update Windows.
Beware...
Aberinkulas