Morbid, who me? Never. lol
Excuse the bad pun in the title but it had to be done.
So first things first, I guess I should address the 'Why is a perfectly healthy 18 year old girl considering her own wake?' the answer to that is actually quite simple.
When I was 7 my dad was killed, when I was 9 my mum's best friend's son died at 9 of a brain haemorrhage, when I was 10 my uncle in Scotland died, when I was 15 my godfather and only uncle died of septicemia and then when I was 17 my grandfather died on an undiagnosed tumour than burst and again sepcticemia - so needless to say there have been a lot of deaths in my family and, as a result of being exposed to death from such a young age, I have no real fear of dying or the dead and it is a fairly common topic of conversation between family members.
Tonight me my mum and my mum's friend were discussing wakes, which are, as the title suggests, becoming less common!
Being Irish and wakes being a big part of Irish tradition I feel knowledgable enough on the subject to enlighten you to the traditions behind a wake. In Ireland long ago it became tradition after the death of a loved one. Essentially it is a period of greiving during which friends and family members of the deceased come to say their final goodbye and pray for the soul of the departed. That's the religious aspect of it; now for the fun part.
As we are Irish we like to look to the good times rather than the bad (and we're also partial to the odd drink too)and it became customary for people to hang around after saying their goodbyes and paying their last respects and share stories and memories of the deceased. Nowdays it's pretty much the same only we've becomg more refined such that tea and sandwiches are served instead of whiskey or rum.
In my time I have been to many wakes and I have to say that despite the sad nature of the gathering I have had some of the most hilarious and fun evenings of my life at wakes. Everyone gathers and in the room with the dead they shed their tears and utter their profound words but then they come to the kitchen and remember the good times and before long everyone is in hysterics.
My first experience of a wake was my dad's; a very sad circumstance indeed. I was only 7 and hadn't much clue as to what was going on but looking back now it was more like a circus than a wake. Reporters were knocking on the door every half hour to ask for interviews with my family or a comment or a picture (my dad's death was kind of high profile over here) and it was always busy. At the age of 7 I was running in and out of the "Dead room" talking to my dad as he lay in his open casket and thought nothing of it.
By the time my uncle had died I was old enough to be involved in the proceedings and helped serve the tea and usher mourners to and from the body. And by the time my grandfather died I was dressing the room (the bed/table on which the coffin sits must be covered with a white cloth and all mirrors covered or removed. A candle must be burning in the room at all times) and holding court by the coffin (talking to mourners - usually involves explaining the nature of death and thanking them for their presence and kind words)
In my own personal experience I have to say that wakes are a testament to undertakers. Every wake I have ever been to has been an open coffin and the body has been made up brilliantly. Which with 6 gunshots to my father's head was no mean feat for the undertaker and my grandfather dying abroad meant it was a week before we got his body home and the elbalmers did a great job - minimum decomp and he didn't smell that bad.
Nowdays though the wake is becoming a thing of the past it would seem with more people choosing to 'wake' their loved ones in funeral homes rather than in their own home. Personally I will wake every member of my own family and want a wake myself. Funeral homes have limited excess and opening hours whereas the wake house is always open and the family can stay with each other at all times during their tme of grief. And I also hate the thought the the departed is left alone in a cold dark room over night.
To me a wake is a celebration of the life that has passed and I know I would want mine to be a damn good party. So I have instructed everyone I know who may be there when I die that I wish to be waked and so help me God if they put me in a funeral home I will haunt everyone of their asses!
If you read that whole morbid script I would like to say to you congratulations! I was just very bored and over thinking so I thought I would share lol