hey thereee. long time, no chat. hah. according to my blogs it's been longer than it really has been. but that's just because i lost like five blogs in that mess. but i rather have my old ones back than those ones so i am okay with it. hah. so i got into college. and i am going. and it's crazy scary. like i kinda did it just because i could. and now it's actually happening. and it's so weird. i haven't old like anyone. not even kat. which is going to be so hard. i don't know how i am going to do it. like i am leaving. and have to live with my dad. which is going to be troublesome. but whatever. i'll deal. for at least four months. and then maybe get into rez. and get a parking pass. because it was too late. and now i am stuck with the bus or the train. which is lame sauce. i like me car. i am excited though. i need this. so much. i can't wait. once i tell everyone. leaving. frick. that's so insane for me. i have never moved. i have always just been me. here. in this room. which my mom and my sister. so insane.

so i just got back from vacay a couple of days ago. me, my dad and kat went to ontario. drove. insane. 16 hours, speeding. slept a good portion of it. me and my ipod got even closer over the trip. love her. the vk was decent. i was pretty much stuck on an island. which was kinda insane. i am the girl who just goes to the mall because i can when i am bored. and i was stuck. kat caught like five fish. which i didn't take part in. was on the boat though. laying back. ignoring it all. one day we visited one of my dad's childhood friends. and i swear to the god i don't believe in that his kids haven't aged in the past seven years. it was so weird. like the boy who would have been like 11 last time i seen him was identical to what he looked like then. and same with the daughter who would have been like 8. so weird. i hope i don't still look like what i did back then. it would not be good.

teen choice. my buddies the jb's hosting. kind of boring. gotta say. enjoyed both jb performances. but that was about it. nothing really exciting. miley's performance was concerning. and i like miley. a lot. it's a new thing. and that was just like woahhhh. put some clothes on and get off the pole please. it's teen choice. like seriously half the stuff she does that people freak out about don't annoy me because i know what it's like to be sixteen. i have some not so awesome pictures of myself from that age. and a little younger. but seriously, she doesn't need to advertise it. like be super awesome like you can be. not trashtastic. it's not cool. and her other outfits were concerning. whatever. i still love her. i liked that britney got that award. love her. i am so happy that her comeback was successful. somewhat unrelated. but i am totally obsessed with the disney channel stars song send it on. and the video that goes with it. in love. i need to get over this adolscent love affair i am having.

so kaia took my off limited profile a little while ago on facebook. which was random and weird. but all the sudden her status' and such started showing up in my page. so today i was bored and ended up on her page. anyways, totally creeping and looking at her notes. and she like did this one that's about like 10 things about this, nine about whatever all the way down to one. and like one of the numbers was blank things do you miss. and the last one was lah & lkb. lah is my nickname and my initials. and lkb's are kats. well not actually the initials of her nickname. and the note was from like two weeks ago. i haven't spoken to her in four months. it literally threw me. like it just makes me think so much. like i miss her too. but i don't know how to even approach the situation. like as much as i miss her, theres a reason we haven't talked. ahhh. it makes my heart hurt.

tomorrow is henry's birthday. frick. it stresses me out so much. like i hate going to things by myself. so much. and i don't even know who is going to be there. and i don't have someone to cling to. and i haven't talked to henry in so long. like two weeks. but that's a long time for me when i am supposed to see someone. i will probably text him tomorrow. but i hate texting people first. and like his birthday is the year mark of when our friendship got all effed up. well it was the last day it was kind of normal. and everything went to crap a couple days later. and we have never recovered. and i can't help but think about that. like it used to be so different. i miss it. and i wanna dwell on that a little. the good news that is kent is bound and determined to get me out and is obsessively talking to me about the party so i know what is going on. and him and his girlfriend just broke up so maybe he can be my buddy at these events. that would be nice. and like i don't know what to wear. like bowling. i wanna show off a little. like i look so different. i don't know. i am kind of crazy that way. it would be nice to be the pretty one for once. the one that people notice. not just the fat friend. blah. i think way too much. and like i don't know if i should tell everyone that i am going to college. like a few of them are going there too. i don't know. and i know i am just stressing over nothing and over thinking everything as per usual. but these things stress me out.

quiz.

Are you legal to drink?
where i live. but not really anywhere else. it's eighteen in ab.

Do you straighten your hair?
haven't in forever. but i can and used to all the time.

What's the closest black thing to you?
the black shirt i am wearing.

Who's in your profile picture with you?
the tree i am hugging.

Besides this, what are you doing right now?
talking to kent and listening to free fallin'.

Something you just don't understand?
lots of different things.

What is the last non-alcoholic beverage you had?
white cranberry, raspberry iced tea.

Are there some songs you can't listen to because they remind you of something?
none that i can't listen to, but there are some that make my heart race and fill me with memories.

Last time you felt physical pain?
i can't remember.

Do you hate anyone?
no.

When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?
today during my kaia revelation. there was phone calls being made.

Current mood?
it's all over the place.

Do you think you will ever be married?
not against it.

What were you doing at 8 this morning?
in bed.

Your phone rings, what do you say?
hello.

What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?
i really need to stop listening to before the storm. but i am not. and listened to it again.

Do you like your handwriting?
somedays.

Are you the one of those kids that cut their hair by themselves when they were younger?
nope, i hit that stage more in my teens when bangs were a big deal so i cut them myself. often.

Would you ever dye your hair blonde?
a pale, freckled girl, naturally very dark brown hair. i am going to say no.

Is there one person you look at and automatically smile?
yes.

Your best friend tells you she's pregnant. What is your reaction?
uhh, what?

Do you drink energy drinks?!
never, that crap is baddd.

What are you going to do after this?
stalk youtube.

Do you know anyone that smokes pot?
i am not close with anyone who does. but i know a lot of people who do.

If you could change your eye color what would it be?
either really green or blue. i love the contrast with dark hair.

What did you do last night?
watched tv, slept, read.

Do you like poptarts?
not so much. but i have a good story about them.

Where will you be 12 hours from now?
probably right here. hah. i will go to bed sometime around two and i will wake up and end up back on here.

Do you know what you are going to wear tomorrow?
that's quite the debate in my head. but right now i am leaning towards my white jean shorts, my black tank and a really loose grey tank and my boots and lots of necklaces and bracelets and rings. mhm. i am thinking that might work. but it's not supposed to be really nice. so i might have to wear my skinny jeans and in that case i will likely rock a vest along with my shirts. i don't know. it's going to take me sometime to get ready tomorrow.

Are you on a desktop or laptop?
laptop.

What color are your socks?
beige and resemble feet a little.

Last thing you got in the mail?
tax thingy about the money i donated to relay for life.

What is your current crave?
soup.

Do you feel awkward when strangers say "hi" to you?
not really.

How many cell phones have you had in your life?
three. some lg clunker, a razr and now my pearl.

When do you go back to school?
soon.

Did you have a good birthday this year?
yeah. it was nice. and i know it will still mean a lot to me in forever.

Would you date someone 8 years older than you?
in theory, no. but you really never know.

What movie do you really want to see right now?
i really wanna see the new harry potter. which no on will go to with me. and then i wanna see the time traveler's wife, bandslam and post grad.

Do you drink tea?
green tea is my bff.

What color shirt are you wearing?
black.

Would you tattoo someone's name on your body?
nope.

Where is your most ticklish spot?.
feet.

Do you have over 200 MySpace/Facebook friends?
facebook, yes.

Do you swear at your parents?
i don't even swear in front of them. which is pretty insane considering the potty mouth in possess.

Have you ever crawled through a window?
several times. and none of them involving sneaking in or out of houses. mostly due to locking myself out or being with people when they are locked out. and the fact that i am so little i always get the job.

Did you have a dream last night?
can't remember. i never remember them.

Are you good at giving directions?
decent. i like to draw people maps.

How many pilows do you sleep with?
sleep on one, have two on my bed.

Do you prefer to take showers at night or in the morning?
morning, they wake me up. and have a lot to do with what my hair looks like.

Do you go to school currently?
it's august silly.

peaceee.