My friend stapled my hand

*in Philosophy class*

Friend: *holds out stapler* "Hey, Will, put your hand in here."

Me: "OK." (thinks) He'd never be dumb enough to actually close it on me. *puts hand in stapler*

*friend puts pressure on stapler*

Me: (thinks) Uh, he wouldn't be that dumb, would he?

*click*

Me: OW! WHAT THE F***!! YOU JUST STAPLED MY HAND YOU F***ING MORON!!

Teacher: Are you alright?

Me: No, I'm not alright. There's a staple in my hand.

Whole Class: ROFLCAKES

Long story short, it was stuck in my knucklebone. The first aid lady had to pull it out with tweezers.