Hi, friends...just a quick update. I have read a lot of your recent blogs and wish I had time to respond. There is a comforting familiarity in those blogs, and I thank everyone for simply writing what you do. Thanks, too, for all the pm's asking about my brother.
At this point, he has only a few weeks to live at best. 10 days of chemo failed to stop the spread of the cancer in his spinal column, or ease his symptoms, and his doctors at Anderson (Houston) finally admitted to him and his wife that most people treated for this rare cancer don't live more than 12 weeks past diagnosis. He was diagnosed in early February, so you can do the math. Sadly, he is not accepting visitors, as he is barely conscious most of the time. He's so fragile that the doctors told him he can't be taken home to Dallas even for hospice care. As he told my sister in law, "well...I guess that's that.". What more can I add.
Grandpa, on the other hand, wasn't as cantankerous as I thought he's be a few weeks ago during his "forced move" (his words) to "the prison" (his words again). The assisted living facility he's now in is, in a word, spectacular. The staff is friendly, the food is incredibly good (white-cloth dining at all meals), there's a nine-hole golf course on site, chapel and concert hall. As I stood in the lobby of the main building and read the "Today's Activities" calendar (beadworking, bingo, a presentation about the native birds of the Everglades, an afternoon tea with the founder of Robb and Stucky), I found myself thinking, "gee, I'm ready to move in myself". I think grandpa has accepted the necessity of the situation. The fact that he gets to keep his condo on the beach (and go home to stay there once in a while whenever one of his many children or grandchildren come for a visit) has made the move a little easier on him. Fingers crossed that he's a little more upbeat everyday.
I haven't been able to write (let alone read or respond to ) any of my friend's blogs for the last couple of weeks, and I've missed you all.
We are having two serious problems in our family right now: for months my 91-year-old grandfather has been so infirm that he can no longer live safely on his own. After my mother flew to FL for a visit and found him lying on the floor (fortunately, he had only been there for about an hour), she and her siblings said, "enough". He refuses home health care, though his doctors pretty much ordered it, and he can well afford it. So he must move into an assisted living community. His heart is bad, he should never, ever be alone, but he is mad at everyone and says his children are "pushing him". They just want him to have the best care when they can't be there (none of them live even close), and not to find him dead like Mom almost did. He is so mad that when the home comes to move him on Wednesday, he refuses tohave any of his own children there. So, I have been elected to go since I am the "favorite grandchild" and they don't think he'll scream and carry on with the staff, his doctors, or the movers if I'm there. I haven't seen him in two years, though we talk often, and he has never been anything but a wonderful grandfather to me. I'm scared and nervous about what I might find, but I have no choice at this point.
The second--and much worse--problem: my oldest brother is officially terminally ill. He has had cancer since 9/2006, and they thought they had it beat, but no, an MRI done yesterday in Houston revealed that the cause of his recent, excruciating headaches is inoperable, Stage 4 cancer of the brain and spinal chord. All of us are just beside ourselves. He is the oldest of my father's seven children, and our youngest sister (age 27) just died of sudden liver failure in November. He may only have a few days left. This is just all too much for us. I'm not a religious person anymore, but it helps to have people here who I know can at least keep us in their thoughts (and yes, even prayers). Thanks for listening, and I'll keep you all posted.
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