The Promise

I have stood under the eaves for all these nameless nights, waiting. The moon, in her luminescence, has been a faithful companion, touching her silvery beams upon this solitary figure. I am grateful for her presence; it is always beautiful to have someone to walk with, someone who understands the depths of a sorrowing heart.

I shiver in the chill of the Autumn air.  How fitting that Autumn should herald the coming of Winter, and that the changing of the seasons should see my love waning. In the trembling of the leaves, in the last moments before they fall, skittering and floating to their amber-gold graves, I see echoes of him.

The smile in his eyes and the laughter that came from his lips. I can remember the warmth of his touch, the clasp of his hand as the promise was made. I love you. I heard the beat of his heart as I lay nestled in his embrace. I love you. I saw my fingers, fragile and trembling, as I caressed his cheek. I love you. I heard it in the whisper of my lips, tremulous and soft. I love you. And the leaves fell all around us, touching, dancing, and swirling, encompassing us in the scent of love.

I love you. The night wind mocks me, delighting at the sight of my forlorn figure. She whispers his promises in my ear, empty words devoid of life, of feeling, as empty as her fingers unrelentingly cold against my skin. I turn my shadowed eyes to her and the night wind ceases her play. Callous though she be, even she doesn't have the heart to stand before one whose eyes speak of stark pain.

He held my hands that day but his touch was cold, chillingly so. It seeped through me, cocooning me in a cold, numbing haze. I heard the beat of his heart but it was not for me. I tried to touch his cheek but he turned his face away. We were strangers in that place. And the leaves fell, mahogany-brown, darkest red, and amber-gold, floating and trembling, shushing my heart, willing it not to cry as his words rained with finality. He did not see the bewildered pain, could not comprehend the barrenness of the heart he had laid open. The tears never came; no tears could ever hope to assuage the agony. And I stood there while all around me, the leaves danced their paean of death.

I have wept my eyes dry. In her silence, she weeps along with me, for a heart broken, for a heart betrayed. But she tells me, too, that the winter heart will not stay forever. Heart be soothed, heart be still. Someone will come, someone worthy of my love; till then in my pain, i must remember to nurture hope and love. And she will shine her luminescence on us, on the two figures standing under the eaves and she will leave me, to walk with someone who understands the depths of a loving heart.