It's the month of may and I had to pull myself away from work to make time for this blog Just goes to show that I haven't forgotten your birthdays Silverlaine and CharlieIceQueen will be celebrating their Sweet Sixteens in a few days and because Sixteen is a very special age, here's something dedicated to both of you I wrote this poem years ago and it has been lying in my notebook waiting for the right time, and I think that now is just as good a time.

I hope that you will have a most memorable and lovely birthday and really, if you don't care for lace gowns and pearl necklaces, i will understand....

My affection, love, and hugs to you both^_^

SWEET SIXTEEN

The clock is almost seven

and here i am not ready even

My hair is still up in curls

and I seem to have lost my pearls

My stockings are halfway up

and my shoes nowhere about

I don't have time to waste

I will be late if I don't make haste

The gown of finest needlepoint lace

that I must remember to wear with a regal grace

My curls and pearls are now in place

trembling fingers touch the shimmering necklace

Sparkling eyes and an enchanting smile

pink-flushed cheeks in a little while

I look in the mirror and preen

it's not everyday that I turn sweet sixteen!

Another Christmas and so many things and people to be thankful for; some of them funny and some of them serious but all of them real, the year 2007 in color...pink

*Thank you to Abba, Madonna, Cher, Irene Cara, The Beach Boys, and Stacy Lattisaw for jumpstarting my mornings You make me sing and "dance" in the bathroom And Stacy, i have been looking for you for a long time. I ADORE your song and i just didn't know it was you all along!

*Thank you YOUTUBE for all the great mornings--so much better than a cup of coffee! No calories, too!

*Thank you, Helly, of Tony and Jackey hair salon. I ADORE, ADORE, ADORE my hair It is simply FAB My best look in years And really, the votes are unanimous--all of them in MY favor!! The five hours in the salon was worth it!! it is so pretty that people think i am donning a wig or at the worst, hair extensions!!

*Thank you Body Shop, Face Shop, Bath and Body Works for enabling family and friends to gift me with the things i LOVE the most Really, i ADORE your products!!

*Thank you KOREAN fashion--long blouses, big buttons, puffed sleeves, and wide bands--you HELP me play the part so well!!:lol The look really goes very well with the hair...:lol

*Thank you to the taxi and jeepney drivers who always manage to take me to work on time--and leave my body and soul in one piece, too:lol--and of course, getting me home safely.

*Thank you to my salary for letting me buy my personal digicam--it really is very nice to buy your own stuff with hard-earned money--the fruit of your labors!

*Thank you to continuous roving of the Ladies, Shoes, and Cosmetics Departments. Really, i have the toned legs and hips to show for it i can skip the treadmill for now

*Thank you to PLDT for making long-distance calls so easy and inexpensive to make!

*Thank you cold mornings--for that extra ten-minute snuggle in between the blankets

*Thank you Courage for making me take that BIG step into the unknown. It really is very hard leaving something and people you have been comfortable with for years.

*Thank you HOPE for making me see that something good could come out from something bad.

*Thank you PRAYERS and FAITH for standing me strong in that turbulent time. When He closes the door, He always opens a window.

*Thank you Flanax Forte for numbing the pain when it gets unbearable; to Jo for her wonderful, healing massages, and to Kremil-S extra strength for curbing my hyperacidity attacks.

*Thank you PERSEVERANCE and CREATIVITY for making me finish the story i started last year I hope for your companionship again when i start on my next one or else i will be finishing it in 2009 yet

*Thank you, MINA, a very good friend who is always most enthusiastic in her analysis and critique of my stories I really enjoy your rave reviews They are so inspiring and encouraging!

*Thank you HUMOR--you have saved me from wrinkles, white hair, and premature ageing so many timeslol: and the results are extremely gratifying!!

*Thank you Mary Higgins Clark for NIGHT TIME IS MY TIME and remind me never to change my villain--i was right the first time

*Thank you J.K.Rowling--how beautifully and perfectly explained Book 7 was--all the pieces fitted perfectly!

*Thank you to Philippine Showbiz gossip--really the intrigues and public outpouring of emotions are so dramatic and overboard,sometimes to the point of inanity! Leaves me rollicking with laughter

*Thank you Ferrous Sulfate for beefing up my RBCs--they can be a little hardheaded sometimes by the way, they inherited that streak from me:lol

*Thank you CG and SILVERLAINE for coming back I MISSED you two terribly!!

*Thank you CHARLIE ( for the return of the pink stool) and LAUREN, for writing to me and asking how i am. Am I that in your minds that often?

*Thank you KEWLZ for all the nice things you have to say about my blogs I haven't been around here that much...

*Thank you SUMMER HAYLEY, for making me a godmother yet again i swear my friends and family are conspiring to have my pockets go to let

*Thank you REGAL FILMS for coming out with yet another Shake, Rattle, and Roll Part 9. Either I will scare myself sleepless or laugh myself silly!!

Thank you to a whole lot more of things which are too long to fit in here! A MERRY, MERRY CHRISTMAS to all of us, and a WONDERFUL, BLESSED NEW YEAR!!!!!!

I don't know why I should be writing this late into the night, except perhaps that I just haven't written anything for a long time.

I suppose that's what growing up does to you. growing up brings us to reality, starkly. for someone who is a dreamer and an idealist, it can never be easy. but nobody ever said that it would be, i just wanted it to be colored all rosy and perfect.I wanted to see things my own way, wanted to believe in things the way I wanted them to be. Surely, my future was all out there, waiting for me. My wings were unclipped, ready to soar in the horizon's glow. And I surely believed in all the Amanda Bradley Hallmark cards. After all, if one could write of things like that, then surely one could dream, believe, and hope that it could all ever happen.

But it was so different. The world fell short of my great expectations. Surely, this couldn't be what all those speakers at my school program said; surely this couldn't be the way the world turned. And I had heard so much of all those "the future is yours for the taking." It left me confused, uncertain, frustrated, and even afraid. Frustrated because everyone seemed to accept and live it, and afraid that I might become like them. Confused and uncertain because I could see in their eyes the pity and the mockery at my naivete. I felt deceived, disillusioned, and angry. That's the way it works, honey. It's the way the world turns. You're just so young, just starting but you will eventually learn that it's just how it is. I couldn't accept what people said because I was too stubborn, too idealistic, and wanting to cling to my beliefs. I didn't want to believe that this was it. That I would end up like so many of us: cynical, world-weary, and resigned. I wanted to fight the good fight, to prove that there was a truth to all those words the speakers and the Hallmark cards ever said.

The fight was not easy. The road seemed ever so long and frustration tormented me. I could feel that the flame of hope had dwindleddown to a tiny spark and it frighened me greatly. I could hear myself speaking those same words and I was astonished to hear that it came so easily to my lips. It was so very easy to just fall into the crowd. After all, with the tide going so strongly against me, if I did not swim with them, surely I would drown? I swallowed my pride, my words, and my resolve. My fight was over.

And so I became one of them, the very people whom I had once so despised. The utter mockery of it. And I was amazed at how easy it was to be one of them. To feel nothing and learn not to care. To be cynical and see nothing. To harden oneself so that one becomes impervious to everything. There sure was a big enough room for feelings of drudgery, discontent, and unhappiness. If I chose to become one with them why was I never happy? Why was there this tiny voice which struggled to be heard? Which told me that I was bringing about my ruin, and which hardened as I was, I was still crazy enough to believe in? Was I crazy if I took the chance again?

I took the chance, prepared for the worst. And I ended up living. You see, what all those Hallmark cards and speakers wrote and said all those years ago was true. The future is indeed there for the taking. But what they failed to say was that the world is steeped in reality. That the horizon is not all that gilded and that the too-heavenly future espoused to us may just be an illusion. That reality does play a part in our dreams, that it is interwovenwith life. And that we have to live with it. It has to do with how we adapt ourselves to the world. It is living knowing that some things will truly never change but accepting them. Accepting them but never becoming like them. The most important lesson I have had about growing up.

And life has truly changed. Growing up has had more meaning and isn't that bad at all. I have learned to walk at my own pace, to fit myself and all my ideals and dreams with reality. And though I don't look at my future and the world with rose-tinted glasses, I know thatgood things can still come. I guess that it might have taken me a long time to grow up, but I am glad I did.