get to the point in life where you start wondering.... why am I in this relationship? Is it really worth anything? Can things in life be any worse than what they are right now? Are the choices that you made so far in your the life the correct ones? Ok, now I'm getting a little weird...
Well, I'm at that point in my life... the relationship part. My boyfriend and I have been going together on and off for a while now. But I now have no interest in a relationship with him. I just see him as a friend and not someone that I can spend the rest of my life with. So, I just decided to end the relationship and just go back to being friends, possibly for good.
The sad part is, I'm not even upset about it. When you're not upset breaking off with someone maybe it was never meant to last.
He's actually been irritating me somewhat, lately. He constantly whining about something, he's beginning to be a heavy drinker, he's been really pushy and the list goes on.
He's a few years younger than me but I never wanted a Boyfriend who was a heavy drinker. I don't drink any form/type of alcohol. I've seen what Alcoholism does to people and its not good stuff. It doesn't help when his roommate is a massive party animal and he's just a 21 year old (I think) kid and he massively drinks every night. And he shows no signs of stopping and lost several jobs because of it. *sigh* His roommate's life is doomed. 
As I mentioned, I'm not upset. I have more important things to be upset over than losing a relationship with someone that I wasn't compatible with. Ok, now I sound cold hearted.
Well, onto another topic, I drove on the Interstate for the first time ever a few weeks ago. 
Ok, I know that I'm 26 but I never driven on the Interstate till now. My Mother was with me the whole time and laughing at me. Well, I guess it was pretty funny. I was so tense behind the wheel, my knuckles were actually white from clenching the steering wheel very tightly. I got passed a few times but I wasn't too worried. I was very relieved when they did pass me though. I got so tense when I saw someone speed up behind me. When my Mother and I got to our destination, I couldn't hardly walk or even grip anything cause I was so tense.
I think finally decided what I'm going to pursue for a degree. I think I'm going to take classes for Pharmacy Technican. Its one on a list of the fields I haven't tried out yet. Hopefully, this will work out. I hope I don't get bored with it like I did the others. I just have to gather some info, enroll and boom there I go.
I know that a lot of you are still in your Teen years and its hard to answer about hitting a crossroads in your life. But anyways question, do you ever feel the same way I do? Do you ever feel if the choices you made in life were correct? Do you wish you could've done or approached something differently? Do you ever feel like your at a crossroads in your relationship?
Comments
When you're ready you'll find the right person.... or that's what I'm always told by my Mother when I discuss these type of relationship issues with her.
I don't think you sounded cold at all. If the fire has diminished, and he's going down a path that you do not want a part in, (which I don't blame you) in a way, there's not much else to do. If you're not upset about it, then you must know that it was the right thing to do. In a way, a relief.
I do ask myself the same thing. Almost everyday something comes to my mind and I wonder if I chose the right path. Even down to the subject in college. "Did I study the right field?" I think if we didn't question ourselves and just handled situations without reflecting back on them, they wouldn't hold any / nearly any importance and we wouldn't grow from it. Mentally and intellectually.
Honestly, I could care less about love. I'm 16, the age where most already have a girlfriend or boyfriend. I just, to be honest, don't see the point in a relationship. I was always a precocious little bastard, meaning I matured too quickly for my age. My mom always asks me when I'm getting a girlfriend, and my response is always the same, "I'm not getting a girlfriend, so stop bothering me about it." I don't want kids--I hate them. I don't want a girlfriend or boyfriend--I see no point in a relationship.
Hmm...I do sometimes wonder, what if I didn't mature so quickly? What if I thought differently on relationships? How different would I be if I weren't bisexual? There's lots of things I sometimes think about. I'm a very dead-inside type of guy...I care, but I don't.
And, who knows? I may, in the future, change my mind on things. I may get a girlfriend or boyfriend (the boyfriend'll be hard to explain to my family, excluding one sister who already knows). It's natural for people to wonder about these things. Don't let them drag you down.
No, you're not cold or anything to not feel bad or feel hurt when your relationship ended. You were probably subconsciously preparing yourself for it for an extended period of time.
I know for me, my last relationship was 3 months long. And for the last 2 of them, I was fooling myself into believing things would turn around and be like that first month again. Long story short, after the first month, everything that could go wrong on his end did, and I just kept holding onto a false hope that things would be right again. Well, two weeks ago I figured that it never would when I overheard him talking to someone about not even knowing if we were considered "together" anymore.
I didn't cry, I wasn't hurt...it seemed like my faith in him had cracked before I knew the truth. I guess I was more prepared for it than I thought I was. And maybe the same goes for you. Anyway, sorry about my storytelling and rambling.
Good luck with the pharmacy tech idea, sounds like it could be fun.
If you'd like, we could be friends. It's kinda rare to find another 20-something female on here!
Do whatever makes you feel better but without hurting other people!
Take care!
Juxhe1
...Well i was together with a girl from America, i thought we loved each other but one day she told me "I see you as a friend" i umm huh most like it but after it was probley best so to be friends instead... 
...I want to share that with you!!!.. So do that you feel for Asuka!! Today i'am single these days and never to be hurt either!!...
Take care!
SWEToryu
Man, you've had the worst year haven't you? Oh well. I know how it feels.
Anyway, I agree with everything you say completely. To tell you the truth, I'm 21 and I still haven't had a serious relationship. I get to know girls but after being with them a little while, I get the feeling that this is not the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. I believe in finding that one true person. My mother is always nagging on me, saying that I should find a girlfriend and keep one. But, to tell you the truth, I don't like to be cheap. I would still like to have some dignity. So, I believe in what you believe in. There is someone out there for you and I'm sure you will find him Shannon. It just takes some people out there longer than others to find them. I think you made the right decision. I had a roommate my freshman year of college that was a heavy drinker. He would get hammered every Wednesday and I actually joined in for a while. After my grades floundered, I felt it was time to quit drinking and start studying. Since then, I have been a 3.0 GPA and up since I quit drinking. I'll still drink socially but I don't get hammered.
As for your interstate driving, just relax. To tell you the truth, I find driving on the interstate is way better than driving on normal roads. At least those people speeding up behind you actually have a lane for going around you rather than riding your bumper for the next 20 miles. Damn you tailgaters!
Once you drive on it a few times, you'll relax and realize that the interstate is one of the greatest inventions ever. It's great speaking to you again Shannon. I hope to see you in the Square Enix Gamer's Lounge. Also, if you want, come to the Get Animated Union. I know you would be a great member...if you already aren't.
Let's just say, if you are a member, I haven't noticed. Still, cheer up. I mean this seriously, but I don't think your life can get much worse than its been in the last year. I know what will cheer you up. When I complete it, I'll let you be the first person to read my novel. How does that sound? I think you'll like it. See you later.
mikoyasha