First of all, I want to assure you all I'm not dead. I know I haven't written in a blog in a while, and that has been due to time constraints, lack of inspiration to write (though not for a lack of blog topics), and various other factors. However, I finally decided to write one, so here goes.

Have you ever wondered what your impact is on other people? Their actions, their words, their thoughts. Is anything you say really going to matter, be it good or bad? In most cases, I think the answer is no. If I didn't feel this way, I probably wouldn't be comfortable saying half of the things that I do. But what if it does? What if one word from you could determine someone else's choices? That's empowering, right? And a little scary.

I have known my friend Kimberly for about 2-3 years now. Soon after I became friends with her at college, I met her brother-in-law, whose name I'll leave out to keep him from shame. For the sake of convenience, we'll call him George. (This is about him more than her by the way.) He is a 28 year old Nigerian man, and he can talk like you wouldn't believe. Mostly, he just likes to spout on about politics and religion...and we all just allow him to think he's that entertaining. (Just a joke since Kimberly and he will probably read this. ) But before you say, "oh he's a talker/thinker type," think again. He's also one of those macho tough guys, who gets a kick out of singing Marine songs or pretending he's a cowboy and crushing people's fragile hands when they offer a handshake. All in all, he's mature, brilliant, and a very good-looking man. Not someone you'd ordinarily assume would take anything you say seriously, let alone be concerned of what you thought of him, right?

Especially because he also claims he has lots of other friends. Now who these people are besides the 2 of us is a mystery. Though probably solvable because it is our opinion that they are a figment of his wild imagination.

Now, George sadly has not mastered the art of detecting sarcasm yet, which often becomes a problem because Kimberly and I are the sarcastic type, and we express ourselves in this manner. So whenever we hang out together, Kimberly and I tend to...oh, I don't know...razz him about various personality traits he has or choices he makes, etc. All in good humor, all a ton of fun. Now he claims he hates it, says hanging with us is torture. Clearly lying through his teeth considering he continues to do it.

So, the 3 of us took a trip to Kansas City for a conference, and he had this shirt. A fairly dressy, button-down shirt from Old Navy. It was beige and had scribbled print on it, that you couldn't actually read and was merely for design. There was no real problem with the piece of clothing, after all, it's just a shirt. But at one point, for one reason or another, I kind of made a perceived slight about the shirt. Nothing terrible, of course. I believe the word "pansy" was bandied about. Though keep in mind, he was probably being annoying in some capacity or another because as you all know, I am never to blame for my actions. So when he seemed sensitive at this, Kimberly and I sort of latched onto it, as our go-to insult if he was being troublesome. At one point, right after we had teased him, we walked inside the coffee shop and sitting at a table was a man wearing the exact same shirt! Of course giving us all much to laugh about.

Then, on the trip to Nashville for the Call that I wrote about ( The Call... ) we discovered that apparently, he had thrown the shirt out! Not just gave it to charity, not turned it into something else with a little effort on the sewing machine. He had put it in the garbage! All because we teased him ever so slightly about it! Of course we told him immediately how crazy he was, that it was a perfectly good shirt, that you don't throw things out just because someone cracks a joke ...or 12. We also told him that we only joked to get under his skin, and that he really did look good in the shirt, because he did.

So yesterday, when they were visiting, a few more jokes were made by Kimberly at lunch, and it came out that he went back to Old Navy and bought the same shirt again!!! All because we told him the truth of how good he looked in it! Talk about behavior under the influence.

On the one hand, how nice it is to have someone care about you enough to be concerned with what you think. And how powerful you can feel when you've got someone wrapped around your finger that way.

(Albino Pygmy Marmosets- awww )

On the other hand, how disturbing it is to be responsible for the entire wardrobe of all your friends.

The moral of the story: be careful what you say because people will listen to it.

Or: never make fun of seemingly "tough" Nigerian men who wear pansy shirts from Old Navy, because it will most likely cause them to waste $20- $30 because they take your opinion too seriously.

Hope to be back to blogging more soon, have a nice day/week/month, whatever it turns out to be!