9. Katherine Harris (a.k.a Cruella De Vil in 101 Dalmations), possibly the most hideous female in the history of congress, will be the laughing stock of the entire nation once again for embarrassing herself in her challenge of do-nothing Senator Bill Nelson. Rumors will persist that the ONE vote she recieved was from her "Daddy," who's been 6 feet under for a whole now.

10. It will be revealed that the Jack Abramoff scandal was primarily a Republican scandal. WAIT. That already happened. Nevermind.

11. The last remaining black and gay in the Republican party will quit. This might have already occured as of press time.

12. Osama Bin Laden will finally be captured after he attempts to vote for his good friend and fellow loonatic Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum (soon to be EX-senator).