*If you are reading this, then you probably won't know what it means entirely or Who it's directed to, but just take it for what it's worth or just ignore it. The fact is that I've done something so horrible that I can't even explain it to Someone over and over again that I just had to write and post this to let Him know how tremendously sorry I am...*

I have sinned; Will You take me back this one last time?                                                         

I've said that before, I know...

But my heart can't live knowing that I'm hopeless.

Yes, I've said that before too...

My mind wants to change, but my body doesn't seem to.

My spirit is dying, crying for redemption,

But I can't find it on my own -

And I know that now.

This is me, in my broken state.

Everything I've done laid in the open; on display.

The thought of myself ripping Your heart to shreds makes my soul quiver with regret -

Yet I have done just that.

Over and over again.

So many times that it is impossible to count how many by now.

The darkness and full state of emptiness that I feel in my heart frightens me.

I don't want to lose You.

I know what You are capable of.

Justice and Punishment are Your due penalty for what I have done.

Death forever is what I deserve.

But please tell me that while I'm alive it is not too late to change.

Erase my past and captivate my heart.

Only you can do that, I know...

It's cold in the darkness; show me Your light.

Save my soul before evil and my heart become one.

I will change though I've promised You this before...

How can I show You how much I mean these human words?

Give me lessons on how to love what is right; how to love what You love.

Rescue me because my heart is not able to go down this sinful road again.

My heart is caving in... Caving in...

     - Kyle (to God)

Written by Kyle, April 20 2007-when hope came in again.

First off, I'd like to point out that this blog just so happens to be my first blog of 2007! I just don't seem to be able to remember to blog consistantly... I've got to work on that, ha ha.

So here's some stuff that's been going on in my life since the start of 2007, which, by the way, I must mention has been an awesome year so far!

Music: I got Ashley Tisdale, Jordan Pruitt, and Katharine McPhee's debut CDs all in about the span of two weeks. I like all of them a lot, but Ashley's has to be my favorite. It's just very different and current. In reference to my last blog, I finally gave in to my weird new tastes and broke down and ordered both of Hilary Duff's CDs along with Chris Daughtry's debut - Chris' is very good...

Song of the Week: Faded by Everlife off their new self-titled CD releasing everywhere February 20.

Movies: Not much in this area, but I am going to go see Bridge to Terabithia tomorrow after lunch. It's gotten great reviews and I have been looking forward to it for a long time now, so I can't wait!

Other Areas: Woah... Life's just been crazy and mixed up lately. School's gotten better though I'll never admit that I actually like it to the mass public because I don't... There have been too many things happening for me to post about or even remember for that matter, ha...

Oh! One cool thing that happened yesterday was that I got to visit the set of that popular children's TV series, Between the Lions. It was so much fun and I couldn't believe how absolutely amazing it was. (I even got to do one of the puppets!) Anyway, all of the cast and crew were unbelievably nice to my family and I and I really hope that I get to go back sometime soon.

So, this is pretty much what's been going on with me recently minus a few events that I don't have time to mention, but maybe I'll post about them later. You never know what will happen...

As my title states for this blog, lately I've started to scare myself just a little bit...

I've found myself strangely attracted to Hilary Duff and especially Lindsay Lohan's music. I know you're probably thinking I'm a huge dork, but I just can't explain it. It must just be a phase or something like that that I'm going through. Normally, I never cared for either of these artists, but I just can't help it. I don't know why, and I'm not going to recommend it, but I just might kind of like it a small bit...

Anyway, I have also found it to be extremely fun to make a habit of going to the movies every week recently. I just love the atmosphere and every thing about the whole 'experience' of going. I was disappointed on one visit in particular though where I went with some friends to see Eragon. It was absolutely horrible; there's no other way to explain it. It was so awful that I got up and walked out. Well, I walked out because of the sorcery in it. And I also must mention that it should have been PG-13 and not PG.

Christmas break has been excellent though and I'm thoroughly enjoying every last minute of it. I have to go back to school, unfortunately, on January 4; 4 days before any of my other friends so that stinks pretty badly. But hey, I think I might just make it after all.

Well, I probably won't post another blog until 2007 so I hope that you've had a great 2006 and that you'll have an even better 2007!

Kyle