It's over 1a.m here. Probably a sleepless night because of the fantastic thing which has just happened. Please share this happiness with me or it will drive me crazy.

Good morning my friends. I returned to my apartment last night and have just read your comments on the previous post and I want to say thank to all of you who spent time encouraging me through this hard time. I do wish I had something better to say, but truly thank you for making this small page a confidential place where I could write down things I couldn't elsewhere.

Also my apology for being vague in the last post, it was a fibroma in a little bit nasty position but the medical tests have confirmed that it was not malignant. To be honest, I feel so ashamed when rereading my previous post. I shouldn't have been so, well, pathetic, should I? But you see, in my memory some relations on my father's side died of cancerous tumors and I really do not have much knowledge on this topic. So I can only say to myself that's what happens when one is both ignorant and alone.

Although the incision is healing well, I still feel a bit too cranky for gaming right now. Instead, I have been listening to music a lot and reading my favorite book, a biography of Frederic Chopin. The old book was given to me by my aunt very long ago, and despite having gone through it more than ten times, I always find something new and amazing whenever opening it. This time, the above quotation, an attitude quite different from mine, isn't it?

My friend took a few photos for me in the hospital with her cell-phone. Do you think shameful and miserable experiences are as worth remembering as happy moments in our life?

Tomorrow on the operating table will not be any game, but I. Different, isn't it? Between finding a catchy title, sliding the rating bar: 8.0, 8.5... and receiving the result of your medical tests and an advice "You SHOULD take an operation ASAP"? I remember in all those teen-killer movies, the damsels always have some maudlin guys who wait anxiously outside the operating room and keep babbling "How... how is she?" whenever someone gets out. I do not. Just a few days ago I hesitantly asked one of my colleagues and probably my only friend here to drop into the hospital if she had time and the lady kindly promised to stay with me during and after the surgery. It reminds me that lately, ever since I moved to this city some half a year ago, I have become terrible at making friends, meaning people you feel comfortable to ask for favors in situations like this. And it's even worse to ponder over the Emergency Contact field on the form. Who could possibly? Not my parents, for they are far away and time has worn out their nerves, making them so easy to get panicked. I don't even risk posting this on my main blog because they may happen to read it sometimes. So these few lines are about everything on these miserable moments.

I have been thinking that our time is similar to a seamless flow and rarely do we realize that it's getting away every moment. But some events on that do face us against our current position and how far we have strayed from another point in the past. Anyhow, that's enough rambling. Please pray for me or write a few nice words down here to let me know someone in the world still cares for me. I'm logging out, since it's better to have an early night.