It's been awhile, hasn't it but now I'm here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND FEELING SO SAD:

I'm been gone a long time because I'm just completely and emotionally drained, ppl just treat me like s*** left and right, I dunno what to think, and my best friend, who I really cared for just recently passed away so I've been thinking of some bad things right now like suicide, because I blame myself for what happened, and it shoulda been me. Also I'm not getting any support from nobody and my mother hates me so it's hard to talk to her or anybody about this, so now I'm really confused and I dunno what else to do with myself but I'm trying real hard not to kick myself day-by-day but it's only getting worse! Man, I just need someone to talk to....please