my life has been going down the toilet lately and i've been blogging alot about it lately too. i need some coping advice, my dad's getting engaged to his girlfriend of two years and i feel depressed about it because my life is literally changing before my eyes. it's almost terrifying in a sense. i mean i like his girlfriend but this isn't something i'm used to. my mom's also been pressuring me about my weight alot lately. she says i've put on weight but i don't notice it as much as she does. she never lets me wear short skirts because of my legs which she used to say just had muscle in them but now she's saying my calves are too big or something and my legs are too this or too that, etc. she wouldn't even let me wear skirts during the summer of all seasons, she'd use different excuses like my tights don't go with that skirt or it's too cold out (she used that excuse during the summer when it wasn't cold) or she'd simply not let me wear a skirt period. i always liked my legs and didn't notice i was putting on weight until she brought it up. every day or so before school i'd walk around half or all the main building (it's pretty big) and it never seems to show in the long run. i don't wanna be one of those girls who counts every calorie that goes in their system but i don't need all this pressure either. my sister isn't any better, the bloody control freak treats me like a puppet, she pulls my strings for everything i do and everywhere i go. even when i make the slightest noise in the house they immediately ask "what i'm doing" if my sister asks this i'd say it's none of her buisness and she say i didn't have to be rude and that she was "just wondering". i just wanna cry but nothing's coming out.

i know this is a sad blog, i'll try to post happier blogs in the future but right now my life is in the pooper and i need to write this down.