Roswell Was Pretty Darn Lame.

I'm not gonna lie, a lot of Roswell was really corney and pretty lame. I'm a fan though. Something about trash tv. But I mean, it all seemed very contrived to me, and very 'ship driven, which is frustrating. I think they completely underutilized Tess. The handling of her character, the direction the showrunners decided to go on contingent upon fan-reactions (which were largely influenced by ship support) was the worst case of character assassination I've ever seen on television--right up there with Gilmore Girls and Christopher (again, largely influenced by ship support).

Honestly, these kids are supposed to be 16-18 years old. No one is ever that into one person that much. It was terribly cliché.

I also found the utter dismissal of the alien-plot to be rather ridiculous. It made me quite upset with the characters, with their utter selfishness and dismissal of responsibility. I personally, would have loved to see this storyline progress and develop further. It was all--ohhh what's my destiny? What are we? I want to know everything! -- Oh sh-t! I take it back and don't want to help anymore. Let's all forget this ever happened. Quick--teen drama!

Also, sorry to fans of this character, but Alex was too many kinds of lame for my tastes. Dude was soooo not pretty enough for Kat Heigl.

As for season 3...well, let's just pretend that never happened. I still can't believe the writers gave Liz alien powers. Ugh. Give. Me. A. Break. I can just see them all swooning, "Oh, now Max and Liz really are the OTP!!!1!11one!!1one!!1" I think I just really have a problem in general with the Liz character. Saint Liz as she seemed to be portrayed in my eyes. The doe-eyed brunette was the prettiest, sweetest, smartest girl in school. Gosh darn! How can you not postively turn into a puddle at her feet? Ugh. Now, I know some people say, "Oh she wasn't a Joey Potter! She just had Max!...and Kyle...and Maria's cousin...and 'Dupe' Rath." Oh, and she wasn't the smartest. She wanted to get into Harvard, but all we know is she's good at science! Please. No one should harbour elite Ivy League notions unless they're the best at everything. Especially if they come from a school like the one portrayed in Roswell. Honestly, has it been that long since any of the writers went to university? Do you really expect me to believe that?

The characters were just really, really weak to me. I really didn't like any of them, except perhaps Tess, Kyle was alright to an extent. At least he acted like a real red-blooded teenaged male. I liked the family dynamic between Kyle, Tess and Valenti.

Max - One, true leader of the pack. Strong and silent type. Falls for girl he should never really have. Fights destiny to be with said girl, even when other girl in destiny is pining over him. Thankfully, by some twist of events, said destiny girl turns out to be evil allowing our brave, albeit dark and confused, hero can make his own destiny! Usually with the starry-eyed 'help' of non-destiny-I-make-my-own-destiny-girl. And by 'help' I mean the magical sex that will forever bond the two together.

Michael - Sidekick extrordinaire. Rebellious; at times showing glimpses of great leadership ability--may or may not try to usurp the throne. If so, he is thankfully, by some turn of events, he is stopped, realizes the error in his ways--or is revealed to have been under some other influence--and is ultimately redeemed, and again shown his permanent place as second banana. Also has an OTP, although will likely be much rockier than our hero's 'ship, but will prove to be a modicum more entertaining. Will likely be the typical on-again, off-again I-love-you-I-hate-you relationship. Also, we usually get more sex out of this one. He's more firey and fun.

Isabel - B-tchy older sister, control freak. Cool girl, smart, pretty, involved, potentially witty--cold. But falls for the geek! (Fanboy fantasy, anyone?) Ultimately uneventful. Fairly lame. As responsible as she is, she too refuses to step up to the plate. Sex-wise? Well, I did say this one was the frigid-b-tch. If OTP#3 goes as indicated below, OTP will never consummate their undying love--because one will die. As a result will be haunted by death of would-be lover.

Maria - Snarky, comic-relief, but pretty enough to play no. 2, but loyal enough to never get between OTP#1 (see non-threatening female friend Original Cindy: Dark Angel, Willow: Buffy, Suki: GG--these characters are either fat, married (or in a dedicated relationship before the OTP#1 is set into motion) or a lesbian). And, as is written in the stars, fills in the role for OTP#2, fittingly enough, with the hero's no.2. Not particularly significant, but is more entertaining than the heavy drama of OTP#1.

Alex - Fanboy cum writer projecting, and living vicariously through this character. Is often the surprise hero with through the use of his brains. Is often to clever for his own good, and may meet his demise--or become significantly injured and thus further endeared to the audience for his bravery inspite of his lacking physical attributes--because of his extreme intelligence, or knowledge of a "geeky" topic, often rendered useless. Likely will get with coolest, typically pretty girl, who is a frigid b-tch until he warms her heart, won't last due to tragedy or actor request to leave--usually resulting in the writing of a tragic end to this character. (See Zander and Cordelia, Buffy)