As a film fan and geek, something has been bugging me lately.

'Our stuff' has become too popular, and the people who make it so are the 'wrong' sort.

I don't recall it being OK to be a fan of comic books, Star Trek, Doctor Who, The Lord of the Rings and various other sci-fi and fantasy properties. You were somehow considered a fair target for a near constant stream of abuse, and your chances of securing any attention from females was roughly equal to the chances of stumbling across the Holy Grail at a car boot sale in Dunstable.

Yet, if you look at recent box office numbers, you will be awestruck at how many supposed niche properties only liked by sad people who still live their parents and never have sex are huge successes, drawing in huge audiences of all ages and backgrounds.

Par example:

Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King - $1.19 Billion

The Dark Knight: $1.01 Billion

Spider-Man: $821 Million

X-Men: The Last Stand: $459.4 Million

Star Trek: $385 Million

I was so highly mocked, ridiculed an ostracised for my attachment to these properties, that while I am very happy to see them reach mainstream success and allow me to feel smugly superior for liking stuff before it was cool, I can't help but think that if I was in charge, I'd ban all the 'cool' jock types from ever being allowed to see these movies and TV shows, simply because I'm so petty.

Also, it's thanks to geeks that all those idiots from our school days have their iPods, mobile phones, Blu-ray players, laptops and SatNavs. What great technological advances have footballers, fashion models, TV stars and generally mediocre people given us?

Show us some respect already world!

PS-Incidentally, I don't live with my parents, and as I have a 4 year old, it is obvious I am not a virgin.

I recently began a work trial at PC World. For the most part, I am enjoying myself. However, recently one aspect of the job has begun to drive me slowly and utterly insane.

The endless looping of the same 20 Christmas songs.

Christmas songs. In NOVEMBER. Played on an ENDLESS LOOP from dawn to dusk.

They even have the tree up!

It's meant to create a pleasant atmosphere apparantly, but it just serves to bring out my inner Scrooge. I will be perfectly happy to get into the proper sprit at the appropriate time. Like, you know, DECEMBER!

Grrr

Ah well

PS - In moment of weakness, watched 4th episode of Impressions Show. It's somehow got even lazier. Utter crap.

So, episode 3. I vowed this was the last chance saloon, the do or die, the make or break, the sink or swin. So, has this show turned the corner and won me over?

NO.

Before I lay into my problems with the episode (and the show), I'll be briefly positive and talk about what I liked.

The Johnathan Ross "fwiends, womans, countrymen" speech. Nailed his delivery and style.

Lorainne Kelly as a hitman(well, not man)

Witness Relocation, Witness Relocation (even though it was a reheated gag)

The recurrence of the Ricky Gervais joke from Ep 1. I see what they're doing, and like it

Culshaw's brilliant take on John Craven

The Top Gear skit, although that was somewhat defeated by the fact that the real show is so outlandish and mad anyway, it barely counted as parody.

I am still reduced to howling fits by 'Ross Kemp' running away (the 'gang' being Morris dancers was great too.)

Here endeth the compliments.

OK, so where does this show fail?

1) Too many Running (more like Limping) Jokes

Fiona Bruce as a klepto on Antiques Roadshow, Ray Mears getting confused about animals and ingestingtoxins, Hugh Fearnley-Whatisname eating the animals on Autumwatch, Gok Wan as a horny straight man are actually funny jokes, but there is very little mileage in the. Yet these are being trotted out again and again and again.

2) Crossing the line between 'Mockery' and 'Bullying'

I'm no fan of Wayne Rooney, but portraying him as a literal dog, being walked around on a collar and taken to the vet is not funny. I find it rather tasteless. I also didn't care for the rather dopey treament Boris Johnson was given.

3) Laziness/Uncertainty

If you're not sure how to mock someone, or can't do it very well, don't bother. This episode had a very weak Vernon Kay jab (the accent was flawless, the mannerisms however...), a truly appalling Bruce Forsythe and an Angelina Jolie skit that would have been vaguely amusing in 2007. And why is the David Cameron stuff so unfunny? Portraying him as a creepy supernautral being was the sort of thing trotted out when Micheal Howard was in charge of the Tories ('Something of the night about him' - I know Tory leader tend to blend into one, but come on! Also, Culshaw sounded and looked more like Mandelson, who creeps me out far more than Cameron. It's not like 'Call Me Dave' is hard to spoof, is it? Get it right!

So, I am DONE with this show. Stick a fork in me. Or rather, stick a knife in this show and put it out of it's misery.