Two things. I have been approved for college, so starting Monday, I will begin my course for Network Engineering Technologist! Which means that by next July, I can come to your house and fix your computer for $300/hour 
The other is that I'll be offline for a couple days, maybe a week starting Saturday. Just waiting for the internet changeover.
But yeah, I'm going ot college. Time to get my party hat on and get ready to chase some skirt! I mean work really really hard...all...hours...of the...night. Yeess.
Actually, I have very little room to screw around (both figuratively...and...figuratively, heh) due to strict stipulations associated with the nature of my funding (need to maintain a certain grade point), and the MCSE, CCNA andA+ exams can allegedly be quite brutal, but it's nothing i can't do. I was born for this.
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And thank you waffles. I also know you're trying to get your life back on track and I hope that that starts to work out for you.
and I agree with CodingGenius. Cert tests aren't so bad. I've not done the ones you've got lined up but I've done some software exams and if you use the study guides you'll most likely pass with flying colors.
CodingGenius